I recently had the opportunity to hear a friend speak before a group of high school students. She was speaking about making smart life choices. You see my friend is uniquely qualified to speak about this subject. She is HIV positive.
She contracted the virus from her boyfriend 17 years ago. She was in her early 20’s when she found out she was positive. You see her boyfriend had numerous instances of unprotected sex with numerous partners. She only had him. She told the audience that even after he was told he was HIV positive, he continued to have unprotected sex with her and many others.
When did she find out? After he fell ill and was placed in the hospital. He finally revealed his positive status on what would eventually be his death bed. She said he hoped they would both become sick and die from the virus together.
As I listened to her deliver this powerful message, I felt sad. I felt angry and I felt envy. I know some of you are gasping right now. Yes, envy. You see my friend is exposed. Yes she has been exposed to the HIV virus but I’m speaking of a different type of exposure. She has no secrets. She lives with HIV without fear of her deepest, darkest secret being revealed. She has taken that power away from those who would secretly gossip and mock her. She exposed herself. How many of us walk around with some deep, dark secret that we never want the world to know. How many of us are quick to judge others about their shortcomings, when if our lives were flashed across a movie screen, we couldn’t even find a letter in the alphabet to rate it.
As I looked around the audience, the silence was deafening. I saw fear. I saw curiosity. I saw angst. I saw dread.
My friend is living with the HIV virus. She is also living with failing kidneys and a host of other minor illnesses as a result of the HIV...but she is LIVING. The daughter she was pregnant with when diagnosed is now a freshman in college. She attends church regularly and she is spreading the word to whomever will listen. She warns of the dangers of having unprotected sex. She warns of the dangers of making the wrong life choices.
I envy her courage and her freedom.
